Stories I Tell Too Often.

My talent is watching television.
I LOVE YOU, OLENNA TYRELL

I LOVE YOU, OLENNA TYRELL

I am dying.

Boyfriend’s last tumblr post ever was on our anniversary!

…I can’t tell which one. But it looks like he started dating me and promptly disconnected. <3

I love that dick butt.

THEY’RE ALL STILL ALIVE WE HAD A TALK ABOUT IT

—My roommate whenever she catches me checking on the fish

Hello again boys and girls

I’m still looking for self-identified nerds for a study I’m going to attach to my grad school app. If you’re interested, inbox me please!

So today boyfriend tried to vault over me out of bed to turn off the alarm but I was on my side and my hips were too high and he wound up on the floor.

Some weird and very sadistic part of me is very proud of myself.

The most recent (and probably my new favorite) thing boyfriend made for me.

The most recent (and probably my new favorite) thing boyfriend made for me.

Don&#8217;t hang out with strangers online at 4 AM because this is what happens.

Don’t hang out with strangers online at 4 AM because this is what happens.

If there’s not yet a porno called “Kiki Delivery Service” I’m going to be so disappointed